Have you ever wondered why sometimes things just don’t go your way and no matter what you do you cannot seem to make things better? The harder you try to make them happen the worse they are. You want it all to be perfect the first time but it doesn’t go that way. You struggle and think I want to quit or I want to run away from my problems, which isn’t the answer but you feel this way anyways. When we think like this we don’t always realize the problem starts with us. We are getting in our own way. I learned the hard way that getting in my own way makes a situation a disaster.
Let me give you an example:
One of the many things I enjoy about riding is learning and experiencing new things. I love the thrill of making my skills better and improving my horse. You would think this sounds easy but I have come to find that riding is one of the most difficult things I have ever done.
Why you may ask?
It is because I am in my head all the time. I think that every ride is going to be more perfect than the last and things are going to be 100%. What I have come to find is that it is not like this. I tend to have my worst days when I just cannot get anything right because I am expecting too much at once. With this comes an attitude from me, which feeds into my horse. You can probably guess how these situations turn out and I constantly get told by my trainer that I need to get out of my head, relax and let it happen. This is difficult when you are in denial about it and do not want to admit “defeat”.
Recently I had a show and things did not go as planned. I totally messed up my rides and let things get to my head. The weird thing about the situation was the night before and the morning of I was ready and prepared to take on the tests. I had them memorized and was ready to ride them like I do at home in practice. When I climbed up on my horse the morning of and when I was warming up, I lost all focus and concentration. Instead of using my aides appropriately like I had been practicing I started jerking around my hands and kicking with my heels to get the job done. This caused a mess throughout all three rides. I was disappointed in myself and disappointed by the fact that I had forgotten what it meant to “ride my horse”.
Then something hit me later…
I wanted the perfect ride to keep my scores high and keep a hold of being champion of the circuit. I let this pressure get to my head and of course it screwed up everything I have been reaching for.
This was a not so fun experience and my trainer later told me that I was all in my head again and that she was disappointed that I had let things go the way I did. I wouldn’t let her in to help me. I hate when I get into my head like this and get in my own way. It causes nothing but an upset and makes what could be a good situation a bad one but on the plus side of things it’s a learning experience and one I won’t soon forget.
Stop getting in your own way!
Being in your own way is probably the worst thing that could happen to you and I don’t just mean in riding. There are numerous situations in which this could happen and you have to find ways to cope with it and make it better. A couple of the things I do are relax, listen and admit defeat when I know things are going wrong. This isn’t always easy and makes you feel down but then you think of other things and pick yourself right back up!!! I have learned so many lessons from these types if situations and work harder everyday to make things better and to keep moving forward. One of the best pieces of advise I can offer is: GET OUT OF YOUR HEAD AND OUT OF YOUR WAY!!!!